What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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