I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
