SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
