i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
