So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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