also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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