I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
