I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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