Im at strip club and am horny
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.