How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
