im about as happy as oj after his trial
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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