This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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