my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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