Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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