i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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