Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
