I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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