i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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