i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
