this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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