Who did Billy Mays play for?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
