Walk of Shame. In a state park.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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