I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Randomize