This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
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under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize