he puts the penis in happiness.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
