I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
