NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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