i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
