return my video game
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I seem to have left my pride at pride
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I want a musical about memes.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
