Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize