But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize