He passed out mid-signature
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
how does that bad decision feel?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
