dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!