Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms

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  (917): new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms http://tfl.nu/uasp
  Replies (12) Good night (1224) Bad night (2450)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.

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  (720): the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom. http://tfl.nu/h1iv
  Replies (13) Good night (963) Bad night (3413)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair

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  (316): Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair http://tfl.nu/yhl2
  Replies (20) Good night (813) Bad night (4111)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks

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  (717): i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks http://tfl.nu/zwks
  Replies (30) Good night (5396) Bad night (782)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet

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  (239): Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet http://tfl.nu/je6a
  Replies (30) Good night (1055) Bad night (8860)
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  (315): View more from New York

  can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet

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  (315): can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet http://tfl.nu/ofc9
  Replies (13) Good night (4954) Bad night (709)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.

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  (404): He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful. http://tfl.nu/q2qd
  Replies (22) Good night (9703) Bad night (1179)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.

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  (478): I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been. http://tfl.nu/xper
  Replies (3) Good night (982) Bad night (2825)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal

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  (703): I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal http://tfl.nu/8ovb
  Replies (2) Good night (2147) Bad night (957)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?

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  (503): He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads? http://tfl.nu/30tf
  Replies (7) Good night (2831) Bad night (741)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta

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  (814): She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta http://tfl.nu/cr5h
  Replies (8) Good night (3900) Bad night (1431)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  You would never do this sober.

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  (207): Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good. (617): You would never do this sober. http://tfl.nu/h01i
  Replies (9) Good night (1422) Bad night (595)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it

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  (701): He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it http://tfl.nu/1dio
  Replies (5) Good night (455) Bad night (973)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.

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  (406): We turned a watering can into a margarita bong. http://tfl.nu/ptcq
  Replies (1) Good night (556) Bad night (328)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.

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  (647): Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already. http://tfl.nu/9nhw
  Replies (6) Good night (407) Bad night (541)

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