Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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