honey bunches of taint.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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