he wants to bone in the snuggie
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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