im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
