the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
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Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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