question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Randomize
