similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
