come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize