do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
