New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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