Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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