Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
a search helicopter?!
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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