Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
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I told you penises don't tan
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
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You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?