school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
