drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
