does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
