Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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