Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
